Since I turned 40 my perspective on life has definitely changed. I went through a lot of changes from my 30’s to my 40’s. I was scared to reach 40 but then when I finally reached it, it was all fine, I felt good. I am 44 now and during the last 4 years, I have experienced even more changes but not just physically but the way I feel and think about things. I guess the more years you live the savvier you get. You focus more on what you need and what would make you happy and stop worrying about what others think.
I have put together a list of changes, realisations and thoughts that I have noticed since turning 40. See below:
1.AGE IS JUST A NUMBER
Yes, age is just a number. We are as old as we feel. I don’t really care anymore about how old I am. In fact, the older I get the more I see growing older is part of the amazing experience of life. I am starting to embrace my age even more and I feel very content about it.
I am always reminding myself, that I am never too old or too young to try something different or something new that I really like.
2. STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK
This has become my norm. I have definitely stopped worrying about what others think of me. Since doing this, life is better. I try to focus on myself more and the things that make me happy. Stopping overthinking goes hand in hand with this too. And this comes from the queen of overthinking things! So things have been much better when I stopped doing this.
Caring about what others think becomes a problem when we hyperfocus on their opinions which can later override our own which unfortunately triggers self-doubt and insecurities. This is not healthy and I try my best to not do this.
3. STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS
At this stage in my life, I have finally realised that comparing myself to others won’t help me in any way. We are all different and we achieve our goals at different stages of our lives. Our time will arrive, we just need to be patient.
It is so important to be able to focus on the things that you have done that made you happy and proud instead of feeling less because of other people’s achievements. Be happy for them and be sure your time will come too.
4. YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT YOURSELF
The more you grow older, the more you understand and get to know yourself. By now, I know very well what things make me angry and what things make me happy and I am trying to choose the things that make me happy.
Finally, at this stage, I have learnt how to handle certain things that could potentially trigger a bad reaction in the past. I try to avoid them so I don’t get anywhere near to those feelings.
5. EMBRACE THE THINGS THAT YOU LIKE
I have noticed lately that I am loving certain things even more than before. For example, I am obsessed with flowers. I always loved flowers but now I love them even more or maybe I now appreciate them even more. Flowers make me happy, so I have a flower subscription with 2 companies that provide flowers, so I receive a fresh bouquet of flowers twice a month. I cannot tell you enough how happy this makes me.
Lately, I also feel so much satisfaction with cleaning. I have never been like that before but now I am spending hours making our home look spotless. I love the smell of a clean home so I have wax melts everywhere. I also got a new cleaning cabinet with new gadgets and cleaning products and it has become my favourite cabinet so far. Reading this back makes me laugh but it is so true! Maybe the pandemic had something to do with this due to the lack of being able to hire a cleaner but now that we are able to do it, I am not interested anymore. I actually enjoy doing it and you will not believe how many calories I burn just spending hours doing cleaning, so it is a win win, LOL.
So the point that I was trying to make here is that if you like something or are into something that makes you happy, embrace it.
6. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
One of the things about getting older is the realisation that your body doesn’t respond the same anymore, so you really need to take care of it even more. After a whole year of this pandemic and having to go through a few lockdowns, I let myself go and gained a lot of weight which made me feel unfit and unhealthy. At the start of the year, I promised myself that I was going to take care of myself and would lose weight and try to keep myself active and fit. I have lost almost 11 kilos now and feel so much better.
It is so important to take care of yourself. Eat healthily, drink plenty of water, get enough sleep, get regular checkups, stay active, exercise, mental health matters, quit smoking and reduce the amount of alcohol you drink. All these things will help you to age gracefully from the inside out.
7. WAKE UP EARLIER
This is one of the biggest changes I have noticed in me. I have always been a night person rather than an early starter but lately, I actually enjoy waking up earlier. I feel that I can get more things done if I wake up earlier.
I always hear older people saying that they wake up at 5 am in the morning to make the most of the day. I didn’t understand this before but now I do. I don’t wake up at 5 am yet and it still takes me 30 minutes to actually get up from my bed since the moment I open my eyes but I am awake since 7 am every day which is a massive improvement from previous years and I really enjoy it.
8. ACCEPTING THAT I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF A PHYSICAL CHANGE
I can already notice physical changes in me. I know it will take probably about 10 years or so until I finally stop having my period and that sounds weird but to be pretty honest with you I will be so happy when this finally happens because not having a clue when I am going to menstruate again because every month will be different and having my mood affected constantly is not something I look forward to.
However, even though this whole process will be hard and there will be a lot for me to learn, I am now accepting that this is happening and I am ready to experience this new phase in my life.
9. FEELING MORE CONFIDENT
From the moment I stopped caring about what others think and focused on the things that make me happy, a whole new level of confidence appeared in my life. Understanding what I want ultimately helped me in making my own decisions.
I remember being too hesitant when I was young but now I just go with my guts and stick with it. The feeling of doing what you really want is gratifying. It feels good. I want to carry on doing this because even if I make a mistake, I then know it was my own mistake and I will do what I can to fix it. At least I know I followed my instincts.
10. DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY
I wanted to finish this list with this important thought because at the end of the day this is what really matters. If you do what makes you happy, there is no wrong from there. And this applies to every aspect of your life: career, hobbies, choosing friends, making decisions, etc. If the answer is “YES THIS MAKES ME HAPPY“, then go for it. Life is short and we only get to live it once so we better live it in a way that brings you joy and happiness.
These are the 10 changes/realisations/thoughts that I have noticed in me since I turned 40. I am sure there will be more to come and I am happy with that. I will just embrace them when they come.
What changes have you noticed since turning 40?
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Lovely post. I am older than you and let me tell you, it’s so weird how confident you become because you don’t care what anyone thinks. Or you think you’re invisible so you can do whatever you like. Menopause is a bit of a nightmare, mainly because no one talks about it. I’m an old lady who is STILL learning what is normal with my body. It’s absurd! So get talking about it Ladies, because it;’s a huge disservice to our daughters not to educate and normalise this stuff!! #KCACOLS
Karen, the next best thing to mummy says
It has been a long time since I turned 40#kcacols@_karendennis
I wish that many of these things we could learn earlier in life, its so true that we get wiser as we get older #KCACOLS
As I near 40, this hits! Great tips. #KCACOLS
Some great lessons learnt to make life much more enjoyable x #kcacols
Great advice here – I really need to stop worrying about what others think of me! Hopefully when I turn 40 maybe it will happen haha! #KCACOLS
What a lovely and positive post Franca! Thank you for sharing about these things you’ve noticed since being in your 40s, and as someone who is the same age as you, I can definitely relate to most of these things! xx #KCACOLS
Nigel Soper says
40 was a long time ago for me, and I was so busy with the family, work and church commitments I don’t think I stopped to think how I was.
Priscilla Stubbs says
Great points in this blog. It is a long time since I was 40 but I do now find time to take care of myself and do more of what I want to do rather than what others want me to do. I certainly don’t bother so much about what others think and have so much more confidence than the younger me